Don’t Talk To Me That Way, Girl

By Larry Teren

“You don’t know what you are talking about.” Hey, I always know what I’m talking about but since this was a friend and I was in their house I was obligated to accept a dressing down.        Continue reading “Don’t Talk To Me That Way, Girl”

Being Smart Means Nothing Anymore

By Larry Teren

Danny called the other day after he saw my name on his cellphone’s missed calls list.

Danny: “So, you need a painter?”

Me: “Ha, ha. What else you doing?”

I had tried calling him a few days earlier to see what was shaking. Like everyone else nowadays I felt there was no need to leave a voice mail as he’d eventually notice the missed call. Anyway, I also knew Danny had nothing good to say which is why he waited a few days to return the call.

Danny: “Not much. Finished painting the house myself. Getting it ready for sale this summer. Now that the kids are out , we don’t need so much space and gotta get out of here and into a smaller one in a suburb that has lower property taxes.”

Me: “Yeah, good luck.”                          Continue reading “Being Smart Means Nothing Anymore”

The House Around The Corner From Serenity

By Larry Teren

In late August 1968, our family finally got out of the far west side of Chicago and moved to the far north side. Rather, we were pushed out of the west side- but that’s another story. Now we were in a location that was as if living in the suburbs. There were half built roads and plenty of empty lots along with the serenity that comes with living in an isolated area.     Continue reading “The House Around The Corner From Serenity”

Sunday Night Fever

By Larry Teren

Sunday evenings in the late 1970s and early 1980s were often spent at these so-called well-chaperoned singles events that were at drinking establishments. Sundays were usually slow nights for bars so they willingly rented out their facilities to groups hoping to get the attendees to buy some liquor. Back then driving under the influence was not so vigorously monitored. I didn’t drink but plenty of others who attended these affairs did enjoy to wet their whistle.        Continue reading “Sunday Night Fever”

Do I look Like I Speak Spanish?

By Larry Teren

What a great country! Well, maybe. No seriously. Okay, maybe it is when we are all on the same page speaking the same language. But you will say that this country is known for being a melting pot. The Statue of Liberty proclaims, “bring us your tired, your poor….” Yeah, but the idea is that the terrestrial aliens are supposed to be kind of like trying to learn to speak English so they can melt in quicker, no?       Continue reading “Do I look Like I Speak Spanish?”

The Short and the Long of It

By Larry Teren

I recently read the biography of Dwayne Hickman. For those who don’t know who he is or it rings a bell but cannot place the name- he was the star of The Many Loves of Dobie Gillis a, the television sitcom series from 1959-1962. Dwayne talked much about his relationship with the comedy writer genius Max Shulman. Shulman invented Dobie along with writing the play The Tender Trap (which became a Frank Sinatra starring movie), the novel “Rally Round the Flag, Boys!” (which became a Paul Newman movie) as well as provided the original story for House Calls (a Walter Matthau movie).                   Continue reading “The Short and the Long of It”